Here is the negative advent calendar I started 21 days ago when I first ran out of food. Hard to believe it’s been so long. Not eating has changed my relationship to some foods. No longer feel the need to drink two liters of soda a day but I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’m going to go buy a huge sandwich tomorrow after I get my money. But maybe drinking tea and coffee will have a new place in my life that used to be occupied only by soda. Emotional drinking. If I can’t have liquor, and I REALLY can’t, I tell myself I ought to get some enjoyment from drinking, meaning sugar. Maybe black cafe or a bit of tea with a touch of honey can satisfy that oral need I seem to have. Surely I’ve lost weight since I started but more importantly, I still crave healthy food more than gummi bears. A few bolillos with some cheese and chiles and tomatoes makes a pretty decent meal. And a bolillo costs 1.5 pesos or about 7 cents. I hope I can hold onto my money better this month. Try to be reasonable and not chase any food highs the way crack addicts chase those elusive first blasts. We shall see I guess. Only going to turn over 12000 of the 15k I owe. I should have another 9k coming with the article I just finished. About ten hours of work for $500. Not bad I guess. Wish I could get more of it. 

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